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Unleash Your Inner Dominatrix

bondage-experienceAre you an ambitious type-A personality who likes to be in control of most situations? Do you feel uncomfortable letting other people make decisions? You may be a hidden dominatrix! If you don’t already enjoy BDSM you may find that there are aspects of the practice that will totally transform your sex life! If you’re attracted to the idea of being a dominatrix take some time alone to explore this side of yourself. Reflect upon your most satisfying sexual experiences. What happened? Did you have total control of the situation? What efforts can you make to repeat the experience?

Exploring your local adult toy store or an adult website is an excellent way to educate yourself on the world of BDSM. Browse through the selection of paddles, restraints, whips, gags and costumes and see which items you are most naturally drawn to (click here to see what we sell). What can you imagine yourself using on your partner, and how?

Start with beginner BDSM toys like cushioned paddles and cuffs. If you see more advanced toys that really turn you on there is no harm in buying them, but don’t expect your partner to be ready to use them right away.

Once you understand your inner dominatrix it’s time to explain your desires to your partner. Keep in mind that not everyone has natural submissive tendencies. If you are in a happy relationship chances are your partner already has submissive traits that compliment your dominating ones. Whether you are in a committed or casual sexual relationship, your partner will most likely need some time to think about your dominance/submissive proposal. Just as you took time to explore your dominant side alone, your partner needs time to explore and accept their submissive side. For a BDSM relationship to be fulfilling and successful each partner must fully understand their roles.

After your partner has had time to consider your dominance/submissive desires sit down together and discuss a starting point you are both comfortable experimenting with. It’s very likely that your partner developed fantasies of their own while exploring their submissive side. Before you begin agree upon a safe word to use if either of you begins to feel uncomfortable during the dominance/submissive play. Choose a neutral, non aggressive word; shouting ‘no’ or ‘stop’ can send a negative message to your partner and completely kill the mood, while a neutral word like ‘rosebud’ will let your partner know you’re becoming uncomfortable and allow for a smooth transition into a more ‘vanilla’ sex act.

It’s a good idea to start slow with dominance/submissive play, especially if your partner is new to the submissive role. Role playing is a great way to break into BDSM play. Dress up as a sexy cop and have your partner play the convict who must pleasure you to gain their freedom. Play with the beginners cuffs and paddles to discover what turns you both on.

Use your imaginations and soon you and your partner will have a long list of dominance/submissive fantasies to act out together.

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