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Date your Spouse!

Couple Bicycling at the BeachIn modern society divorce has become almost as common as marriage. In fact for every three couples who marry in Australia each year two other couples get divorced. Some see this statistic as evidence of a throw away attitude in our culture but in reality divorce is rarely seen as an easy solution for a couple’s problems. Most couples don’t begin their marriage with the idea that divorce will ever be an option. If the couple continues to nurture their relationship after their vows have been said divorce will never be seen as an option. It’s when the core relationship between spouses is neglected that divorce becomes the only solution. There is one simple and enjoyable activity that can keep your marriage strong: date your spouse!

Yes, the demands of everyday life can be demanding and distracting. It is very easy to take for granted that your relationship is strong enough to endure neglect while you deal with your career and family responsibilities. But as the period of neglect grows longer that strong relationship begins to weaken. Like falling IN love, falling out of love takes time. Before loss of love couples experience loss of intimacy. Loss of intimacy occurs after loss of romance. Keep that romance alive by taking time alone to remember why you fell in love in the first place. Before you were married you took the time to get to know your partner. You went out of your way to make them feel important. Their happiness was at the top of the list of your concerns. Why in the world should that change after you’re married?

Here are some ideas and guidelines for dating your spouse!

  1. If you have children don’t entertain any guilt about leaving them with a sitter while you focus on your spouse. Before you were a happy family you were a happy couple. To remain a happy family you must remain a happy couple. Keeping your marriage healthy benefits your children as much as it benefits you.
  2. Don’t limit the topics of conversation on your date. Many couples agree not to discuss work or the kids but that can be a mistake. If a work issue is weighing on your mind who better to talk it out with than your spouse? If you want to talk about your children who better to understand than their other parent? The subject of your date conversation isn’t important. The fact that you’re communicating is.
  3. If you’ve made a date with your spouse do everything in your power to keep it. If something happens that requires your attention do your best to compromise your plans instead of canceling them. For instance, if an office emergency keeps you from making your dinner reservations have a late night candlelit takeaway picnic instead.
  4. Alternate your date nights between familiar places that remind you of how much you’ve been through together and new places that remind you of how much excitement and discovery is still ahead.
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